multidimensional spectrum

Further to yesterday’s post, this image approaches what I “saw” when Ellie shared a color wheel spectrum.

For me, Spectrum stretches through countless dimensions.

When I received my diagnosis in 2018, I asked my counselor why she thought I was on the Spectrum (I had only recently begun to believe it was possible, based on my experience raising my autistic son).

She named three characteristics as being my most prominent, especially given my adult femaleness:

1. Social awkwardness
2. Sensory issues, and
3. My vivid inner world.

That third one is mind-blowingly vivid, and it’s present with me every moment, waking or sleeping. I’ve been almost-diagnosed with schizophrenia and bipolar because of it. I think when I’m in really deep sleep or meditation it’s no longer “inner” because I check out of my body. So then, I’m in it.

All three of these aspects have been me for so long that I cannot get my head around the rumor that some other people might not experience them.

Sometimes I feel like I’m the white dot, floating at the intersection of a kajillion dimensions and experiences, and from that point, my mind likes to dart out into other points, just to see what’s out there. Or remember something long-forgotten.

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I created this image in Photoshop, with two watercolors and a cropped globe image from Dreamstime.

Cropped globe below:

The watercolor image below was created with Noodler’s black India ink and PH Martin’s Iridescent Nickel ink from this set.

The watercolor image below was created with Kuretake Gansai Tambe watercolors from this set.

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Leslee Hare